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  #1  
Old 07-16-2011, 05:40 AM
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Default Society Summarised (poem)

Freedom, what a funny word
Reminds me of a small bird
Struggling to jump and fly
Away from it's future to die

When you look at life and see
The society you relish has a fee
Everything you ever wanted
Kept you at work like prey hunted

I wonder how it feels to be a tool
Used greedily by high class fools
The things people do for money
Made this world not so sweet and sunny

This poem has a purpose then
That you might be more then a common hen
If this has enlightened your mind
Then maybe true freedom you can find

Felt like ranting a little. In a poetic way.

I have a question to go with this poem though. Who thinks I should go ahead and send this to the local newspaper, if not my local Minster of Parliament? Give them something to think about?
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  #2  
Old 07-16-2011, 07:36 PM
Avatar Driver
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I say why not? It couldn't hurt
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  #3  
Old 07-16-2011, 08:03 PM
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One of my favorite books is about a guy who anonymously leaves his poems in semi-hidden public places. He writes them on bathroom stalls, wedges them between products on the supermarket store shelves...and the unsuspecting public stumbles across a little bit of poetry to brighten their day. I've always thought that was cool. Not saying don't send yours to the local newspaper or Minister of Parliament...I'm just throwing out another idea.
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  #4  
Old 07-17-2011, 12:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Empty Glass View Post
One of my favorite books is about a guy who anonymously leaves his poems in semi-hidden public places. He writes them on bathroom stalls, wedges them between products on the supermarket store shelves...and the unsuspecting public stumbles across a little bit of poetry to brighten their day. I've always thought that was cool. Not saying don't send yours to the local newspaper or Minister of Parliament...I'm just throwing out another idea.
Hmm.. this idea appeals to me for some reason.
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  #5  
Old 08-15-2011, 04:57 PM
Pamtseo Vitra
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Really, really like this poem, and it's senetiment.

As silly as it might sound, I really do envy people who can rhyme, but still produce poems of quality. Rhyming is something i'm not terribly good at, so when I see something like this, it kind of amazes me somewhat.

Anyway, nice work.
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  #6  
Old 08-15-2011, 05:14 PM
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Taronyu
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Beautiful.

When we find that freedom, here is the song to sing:







- I will stay, by you, through the night. Decide your fate,

believe in your vision, don't let life wait.

- My freedom

- I will hold your hand, with all my love. Have faith in me,
embrace your new freedom, you hold the key.

- Decide

- Believe

- My vision

- My freedom
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  #7  
Old 08-17-2011, 10:22 AM
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Palulukan Makto
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Wow this is a great poem!! Bravo sir.
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My fanfic

"The man who learns only what others know is as ignorant as if he learns nothing.
The treasures of knowledge are the most rare, and guarded most harshly."
-Chronicle of the First Age


"Try to see the forest through her eyes."

Réalisant mon espoir, Je me lance vers la gloire. Je ne regrette rien. (Making my hope come true, I hurl myself toward glory. I regret nothing.)
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  #8  
Old 08-18-2011, 06:02 AM
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Great poem, but I think it would be too general a message to send to politicians. Even if they did understand it for what it means, I don't think any changes would come from it.
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  #9  
Old 08-18-2011, 07:02 AM
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Palulukan Makto
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It would be nice to send it to the masses of overworked people though.
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My fanfic

"The man who learns only what others know is as ignorant as if he learns nothing.
The treasures of knowledge are the most rare, and guarded most harshly."
-Chronicle of the First Age


"Try to see the forest through her eyes."

Réalisant mon espoir, Je me lance vers la gloire. Je ne regrette rien. (Making my hope come true, I hurl myself toward glory. I regret nothing.)
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  #10  
Old 08-18-2011, 07:57 AM
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Tsamsiyu
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that was beautiful<3
let your dreams fly man, send it off!
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  #11  
Old 08-19-2011, 01:53 AM
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Mother Falcon
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Thanks guys.

I've got a few more poems now actually, but I'm not too sure what to do with them. Any suggestions?
(you see, It'd be a little hard to send them all to my MP, cause he problably gets hundreds, if not thousands of letters a day :/)
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  #12  
Old 08-19-2011, 03:26 AM
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Palulukan Makto
Pa'li Makto : Once ate an octopus.
 
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Put it in the local newspaper.
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Always listening to The Orb: O.O.B.E...



My fanfic

"The man who learns only what others know is as ignorant as if he learns nothing.
The treasures of knowledge are the most rare, and guarded most harshly."
-Chronicle of the First Age


"Try to see the forest through her eyes."

Réalisant mon espoir, Je me lance vers la gloire. Je ne regrette rien. (Making my hope come true, I hurl myself toward glory. I regret nothing.)
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  #13  
Old 08-19-2011, 04:45 AM
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Tsamsiyu
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make a gigantic collage and tape it to his desk
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  #14  
Old 08-19-2011, 05:52 AM
Pa'li Makto's Avatar
Palulukan Makto
Pa'li Makto : Once ate an octopus.
 
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I like the sound of that though he'd have to sneak in.
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Always listening to The Orb: O.O.B.E...



My fanfic

"The man who learns only what others know is as ignorant as if he learns nothing.
The treasures of knowledge are the most rare, and guarded most harshly."
-Chronicle of the First Age


"Try to see the forest through her eyes."

Réalisant mon espoir, Je me lance vers la gloire. Je ne regrette rien. (Making my hope come true, I hurl myself toward glory. I regret nothing.)
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  #15  
Old 08-19-2011, 08:06 AM
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Tsamsiyu
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sneaking is for sneakers
just walk in XD
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