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Old 09-06-2011, 06:36 AM
Moco Loco's Avatar
Dandy Lion
Moco Loco is a lion in a low place
 
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Meh, I don't always write poetry, but when I do, it comes out as pure angst, and I'm not afraid to admit it. Stand back

I try to forget
I try to forget
I try to forget
I try to forget
I try to forget
That I am alone
I point to my friends
I smile, or I try
Hardly interject, since I don't make sense
Just go along, it was natural
I'm not like you, but it's okay
I still love you
I care about you, but "I can never understand"
This will never be over
or if it is, when? How?
The day I give up everything
to be with someone far away
or just to know them from afar
I'd be content with anything.
I try to forget that I am still here
if only because I don't want to feel lonely
but I'll never stop looking.
Though I've never seen your face
or any evidence at all so far,
I know you're alive.
I know you're there.
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  #2  
Old 09-06-2011, 06:44 AM
Pa'li Makto's Avatar
Palulukan Makto
Pa'li Makto : Once ate an octopus.
 
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I really like that poem, I feel that it might be inspired by current events though.
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"The man who learns only what others know is as ignorant as if he learns nothing.
The treasures of knowledge are the most rare, and guarded most harshly."
-Chronicle of the First Age


"Try to see the forest through her eyes."

Réalisant mon espoir, Je me lance vers la gloire. Je ne regrette rien. (Making my hope come true, I hurl myself toward glory. I regret nothing.)
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  #3  
Old 09-06-2011, 01:59 PM
Pamtseo Vitra
Fkeu'itan hasn't been here in years.
 
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I actually really liked it, Moco... It's in a form like i haven't seen before. It seems to be a simple and endearing expression of a pure feeling. Not dressed up with elaborate language or metaphor.

And yet, the meaning of the poem itself still remains elusive. It's difficult to pin down exactly what or whom you refer to... but I still seem to be able to relate to the vague feeling. (vague in all of it's forms, I suppose, in this case). It's that quality that I also like to it.

(And don't worry about 'angsty poetry', heh... It's all I ever come up with too. )
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Old 09-06-2011, 05:48 PM
Moco Loco's Avatar
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Moco Loco is a lion in a low place
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fkeu'itan View Post
Not dressed up with elaborate language or metaphor.

And yet, the meaning of the poem itself still remains elusive. It's difficult to pin down exactly what or whom you refer to... but I still seem to be able to relate to the vague feeling. (vague in all of it's forms, I suppose, in this case).
Yeah, I write almost no poetry, so I don't really know how to use those devices. I guess it seems vague because it's vague to me too. I don't know who I'm looking for.
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Old 09-07-2011, 11:36 PM
Pamtseo Vitra
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I meant it as a good thing.

It works well, and the feeling came across very well indeed.

True poetry comes from nowhere else but the centre of emotion.
The writer need not do any work... The words themselves should just fall into place.
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