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Old 08-15-2010, 12:23 AM
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Default Well, I'm Back

Hey all, I'm back. Finally. Let me tell you the past couple weeks haven't been easy. It was then I realized how much I loved you all and was very upset I couldn't talk to you all like I used to. I've been falling into depression, because it seems the older I get the more controlling my mom is. She says she's only doing it because she loves me, and that I need to get some things straightened out before I move out, but in reality, I think I have those things straightened out, its just when she's on my back about it is when I slip. For example, she says I'm always late to work (who gives a crap, the job sucks... only a couple more weeks till I'm done with school then quit that job), but she and my dad and sister were gone Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday, and all those days when they weren't there I woke up early, and had time to sit down and watch the mountains from our backyard when I ate my breakfast then got to work on time. Then I watched someone's house for three days, same thing.

On top of taking my laptop, she took something very dear to me and close to my heart. Just like taking Avatar away from me, she says I can't go to any more raves. Thats right, no more raves for the raver. This devastated me and broke my heart. The place I can escape to Friday/Saturday nights, be free, leave all my worries behind and be with others who feel the same way I do about the music. I can't listen to DJ's spin their playlists or their own songs, watch the lights, give and receive light shows, converse with others... she took all that away. That was what I'd look forward to for the weekend... now I can't. This would make me depressed, I cried about it, and felt sluggish throughout my days. that plus being away from all of you made me depressed. I'll admit I haven't been feeling like myself, I haven't eaten as much, I don't feel hungry, like one day all I had was a poptart all day long and didn't realize that's all I had. I wrote my mom a well though tout two and a half page letter regarding the raves, and she just said, "we'll talk about it." I'm 19! Why is she still treating me like I'm a three year old? The conversation will turn out with an argument again, and I don't want to argue.

Anyways sorry about my sob story, glad I'm back, and I'm feeling much better now I'm back. And to all new comers welcome, glad you joined the family!
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  #2  
Old 08-15-2010, 12:31 AM
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Yayyy wb Stanley!
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  #3  
Old 08-15-2010, 01:44 AM
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Welcome back man. I was wondering where you were all this time lol.
Check out some of the new rerelease material!!!

Side note:
If I were you, I'd move out of your house as soon as possible.
Don't waste your time writing papers because trust me, the last thing a parent wants to do is sit down and read a persuasive essay. But hey, who am I to tell you.

But yeah welcome back.
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Old 08-15-2010, 02:35 AM
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Old 08-15-2010, 03:54 AM
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I'm glad you're back, dude

I can't believe she won't let you go to raves, though. That kind of makes me upset. I hope everything turns around for the better.
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Old 08-15-2010, 04:33 AM
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Take away the thing you enjoy most? that's not cool

anyways welcome back
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Old 08-15-2010, 05:22 AM
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Welcome back Stan!!!! Good to see from you again and I missed you as well! As for your mom, I know its much easier said than done but sadly its something you have to put up with until moving out. They always think they are doing whats best. My mom can be the same way

One thing I can say for sure though is that it is much better when you move out! Also, with you waking up early without your parents. I am the same way! At college I always get up perfect but when Im home I take forever and am a huge pia XD
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Old 08-15-2010, 06:38 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stanley_9875 View Post
Hey all, I'm back. Finally. Let me tell you the past couple weeks haven't been easy. It was then I realized how much I loved you all and was very upset I couldn't talk to you all like I used to.
Welcome back Stanley. *hugs*


Quote:
Originally Posted by Stanley_9875 View Post
I've been falling into depression, because it seems the older I get the more controlling my mom is. She says she's only doing it because she loves me, and that I need to get some things straightened out before I move out, but in reality, I think I have those things straightened out, its just when she's on my back about it is when I slip.
EXACTLY. I keep trying to tell my mom this, but even then she insists I'm being disrespectful by implying that she is that oblivious, then she'll take something else away.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Stanley_9875 View Post
For example, she says I'm always late to work (who gives a crap, the job sucks... only a couple more weeks till I'm done with school then quit that job), but she and my dad and sister were gone Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday, and all those days when they weren't there I woke up early, and had time to sit down and watch the mountains from our backyard when I ate my breakfast then got to work on time. Then I watched someone's house for three days, same thing.

On top of taking my laptop, she took something very dear to me and close to my heart. Just like taking Avatar away from me, she says I can't go to any more raves. Thats right, no more raves for the raver. This devastated me and broke my heart. The place I can escape to Friday/Saturday nights, be free, leave all my worries behind and be with others who feel the same way I do about the music. I can't listen to DJ's spin their playlists or their own songs, watch the lights, give and receive light shows, converse with others... she took all that away. That was what I'd look forward to for the weekend... now I can't. This would make me depressed, I cried about it, and felt sluggish throughout my days. that plus being away from all of you made me depressed. I'll admit I haven't been feeling like myself, I haven't eaten as much, I don't feel hungry, like one day all I had was a poptart all day long and didn't realize that's all I had. I wrote my mom a well though tout two and a half page letter regarding the raves, and she just said, "we'll talk about it." I'm 19! Why is she still treating me like I'm a three year old? The conversation will turn out with an argument again, and I don't want to argue.

Anyways sorry about my sob story, glad I'm back, and I'm feeling much better now I'm back. And to all new comers welcome, glad you joined the family!
You could always move out, but you have your reasons for staying.

As for raves, it really sucks to lose an escape. Even though I've never been to one (I would get the "they're all stoners" argument. ). Taking away my ways of escaping, that's the one thing that will get me really, really p*ssed, as I'm usually a really passive guy in real life. One good thing is that my parents are completely oblivious to most things, so when they took my server (for the second time, after giving it back), which contains my music and sci-fi movies collection, I just took everything out the server and gave them the case, so I was able to keep my music collection, and just dropped the components from the server in an old Dell case.

Please don't feel sorry about about telling us your story. I'm here listen. If I didn't want to hear the story, I wouldn't have clicked on the thread.

Mmmkay... I think I'm done rambling.
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Old 08-15-2010, 07:40 AM
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I wanted to say a load of things... but it's already been said by everyone else in this thread

So... welcome back
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Old 08-15-2010, 10:28 PM
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Good to see you back Stan, but wow, what awful news. Having the raves and ToS taken away from you has got to seem absolutely cruel. I can only hope that your mom will understand what she's doing and relent in the end. But in any case...glad you're able to come back here!
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  #11  
Old 08-16-2010, 01:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Helicoradian View Post
Take away the thing you enjoy most? that's not cool

anyways welcome back
Yes, I agree...and welcome back, Stanley! You're just in time for the countdown to the Re-release.
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  #12  
Old 08-16-2010, 03:04 AM
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Welcome back.

As for your issues with your family, I look at these as having two options:

1. Change your surroundings. Change your mother. Wait for something around you to change.

2. Change things yourself. I can't say as to whether you or your mom is right, but perhaps try giving your mother something she can trust. Demonstrate just how responsible and mature you are. I believe you are a lot more mature than most of the people out there, but you need to show that to your mother. You might have to act a little. I'm not saying you should change your character, but instead, be proactive about this. It's your life afterall.

My advice of course is option number 2. Maybe you can get by after a couple weeks and move out. Maybe things will work out once you're out of the house. Maybe. I've seen too many kids go to college expecting freedom, only to find their parents still control their lives. I think you'll be a lot better off gaining your independence before you leave.

More advice: First seek to understand, then seek to be understood. Understand that your mother just cares about you. Many parents will be reluctant to give their kids independence. To them, you're still a little kid and they want you to stay that way because, well, they love you. Parents hate seeing kids grow up. You're the oldest child I bet? Well, either way, look at it from their perspective. An outsider is going to have a hard time understanding why you love Avatar so much. A parent from their generation is not going to understand raves or online forums. It's not so much ignorance, but just a generation gap.

So, in all my best advice is to do something that shows maturity.

Hope this works for you. If this advice doesn't sound like a good idea, then perhaps ask a friend's mother. Afterall, mothers know best right? Well.... :p
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Old 08-16-2010, 03:10 AM
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No raves? =[ Thats horrible. Glad to see you back though.
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  #14  
Old 08-16-2010, 01:43 PM
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Glad to here your back Stan.

Not glad to hear the troubles though. Many here have given good advice.
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  #15  
Old 08-16-2010, 02:37 PM
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Really good to have you back Stan. I think we all missed you.

Sucks to hear about the whole rave thing... That's like esentially confiscating your social life.
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