Awww thanks you girls :) *bug Na'vi hugs* now I just need to find that girl haha

But I (think) I understand what you girls are getting at, but trust me, girls are very interesting... and yes, very confusing as well lol nothing wrong with that though its just how guys and girls are different. I've been told by a few friends that are girls (never had a girlfriend haha) I was confusing and I look at myself and think "how am I confusing?" so I guess its the same way, just vice versa... or maybe I have no idea what I'm talking about :D

and you girls are truly making me feel awesome with your kind words I cannot thank you enough

But I am glad points like this were brought up, gives us a chance to really express how we feel with others who feel the same way

You're welcome Stanley. Men can be just as confusing at times. I know, I live with two of them (my husband and my brother). I am glad that I have been able to help you feel better. You have the right idea when it comes to women. Do you think that those men will be happy when all they do is treat women like objects to be used and discarded? No. They aren't happy.

Please continue to have a respectful view of women. Its good to know there are still, in the year 2010, chivalrous gentlemen that treat women well. I know there are many women out there that aren't "ladies" but there are some. Its sad to see our society become so coarse.

it is sad to look around and see how many people still have good morals... but I keep my head up, and there is no way like I said in eternity that I'll think of woman any less than I do now... there is no way. Like Cyan said, you women are beautiful and sacred... i cant trash precious jewels

Ally !!!!! I see you :D

i totally agree in what you said :D , i know that you are an awesome person and also somebody that i'd like to meet (as i'd like to meet all ToS people :D) i have to say that all my friends at school think that "how you look is how you are" , but honestly ... i don't care if i look cool or not ...

"you women are beautiful and sacred... i cant trash precious jewels "
EPIC AGREEMENT :D :D :D

Damn motherf*cking right on ally!

I'm sick to death of people following blindly every single f*cking word the celebrities, magazines and TV say about this so-called 'fashion', and so many other things in life. Creating identi-fit people with uniforms... it's all such bullsh*t that it makes me want to throw up. People telling you what 'look' is 'in', what to listen to, what to watch, how to act...

I'll wear what i damn well want to wear, dance how I want to dance, listen to whatever the f*ck I want to and won't let anyone say otherwise.

No, I don't like ke$ha or Akon. I couldn't care less who just split up in Hollywood. Don't like it? Deal with it. It's who I am. If that makes me uncool, sad, clueless, whatever you want to call it... fine. I'm the uncoolest person on the face of this Earth. I don't give a sh*t.

I am who I am.

Edit: WOW. Looking back there I really exploded. :S

LOL, that's ok Fkeu'itan. You are right. Who cares what Hollywood or the media says. We are all individuals. We don't have to follow the crowd. Just be yourself :).

i have never cared what other people thought about me.

I have to say with casual clothing, I dont care what I wear. However, I have to admit that when it comes to my nicer clothes I am somewhat bad. What I mean is like suits, dress shoes, and the like. I do it more because I want to present myself a certain way and this is what I feel true "fashion" is. Now days it has become everyone should look like Ken and Barbie, and girls must be pencil thin.

This type of thinking bothers me also. Every woman is so different and has a different type of beauty among them there is no way you can narrow it down to a certain look. I never understand the people who go for a certain "look" in a partner, there are way to many different forms of beauty.

So yes, I can be materialistic at times but it does pertain on the topic. Also, while I believe with initial meeting looks do play an important role of attraction to the person there is much more than what is on the surface and I love finding what that is. As has been mentioned, girls are mysterious and confusing and I love it :D but damn are girls mean as hell with eachother! LOL I am honestly happy I am a man and do not have to deal with all the crap that is forced at women, my empathy goes out for all of you.

I see you too !!
awww! and i liked your rant!! it is DAMN GOOD! you shouldnt care what people think and im glad you are doing what u want!!

haha and gunny, it is so true what people say about beauty.. its all diffferent!

I agree with much of what has been said, but I still feel like I have something to add.

It seems like too many people see things in black and white. Specifically (as a guy), either you're "overly sensitive and possibly gay" (for trying to be something other than a testosterone-driven maniac) or you're "a sex-crazed ****-ing machine." It's as if there's no in-between.

I guess it boils down to "expected gender roles"--we somehow want to both live them (because they provide cognitive shortcuts to what we "should" or "should not" do) yet we reject them for, among other things, helping lead to the objectification of women and dumbing down of men.

I will freely admit to thinking about whether I find someone of the opposite sex "attractive" or not. I don't think there's any harm in that. Where the problem comes in is when one translates thoughts of the person's physical appearance to their value as an individual. Just as perspective, there have been many different definitions of what "looks good" over time: for example in ancient China baby girls' feet were bound and crushed to make them as small as possible. This was considered the mark of highest beauty. During the Victorian (I think) era there was an obsession with corsets and using them to obtain a very specific waist measurement (the number eludes me).

It amazes me that these "fashions" are so fleeting in a historical sense, but can do so much damage to peoples' lives while they are in force. To me, there's personal fashion (which is one's self-expression as an individual and barring actual self-harm isn't really something I feel I should judge) and societal fashion (the expectations I was just talking about). The latter category encompasses both "Women should be ___" and "You don't wear jean shorts to a business meeting."

Now, while I'm generally supportive of personal "expression" I also don't like people who are purely negative about it, i.e. "I'm not doing X specifically because everyone else is." I see that as an ironic case of someone "rebelling" by allowing what "everyone else" is doing to dictate what they do (if everyone else A, I then not-A).

Anyway, my Photoshop install went south and I really should go to bed (and stop typing so much).

hey!^^ im glad you came in here! I see what you mean by how men are told what they are too.. like there is no inbetween.. i think we should all be treated with respects as an individual and have our own self fashion.. what you said about the poor China babies' feet made me sick to my stomach in the sense that it was completely cruel... i cant see why they would do that? same with the corsets! all they do is want discomfort for women so they can look more attractive for the man.. wow.. that is brutal.. just had to add that..

I agree with what you say here Gunny. When it comes to dressing up for an interview, a business meeting, church, a wedding, a funeral, etc then yes, you should dress appropriately for the occasion. I dress up when I go to church and to special occasions like the ones mentioned. I make sure that I look appropriate because its the proper thing to do. However, I think that Alleycat and others are getting at is the gross materialism that comes with obsessing over fashion and the looks of the individual. Of course there will be some physical attraction to the person that you wish to date/marry, etc. That is part of the chemistry but its not the total person.

Sovereign, thank you for bringing up the issue of gender roles because this is a source of much confusion now. It is sad that women are being objectified at the same time men are being asked to be dumbed down, etc. That isn't true either. Men are just as diverse as women. If a man is sensitive then that doesn't mean he is gay,etc. True masculinity doesn't mean being a sex-crazed, agressive, maniac. No. True Masculinity means to be loyal, kind, strong, and protective. That can take different forms and of course men can be compassionate as well, etc. Women are more nurturing. Afterall, it is women who are the ones that bear the babies. I know that gender roles have been reversed, etc but honestly men, do you find yourself attracted to or intimidated by a woman who wants to act more like a man?

I might be getting off on another subject here in regards to gender roles and how they are perceived. They are constantly changing. The current attitude toward gender is still, I believe, a reaction to the sillier aspects of gender roles in the 19th century that resurfaced in the 1940's and 1950's. The roles are not so black and white but what I think has been detrimental to society is the building up of women to the point of dumbing down or feminizing men.

My point is is that there has been this silly competition between the sexes for too long. We have our different gifts and when they come together, they complement one another. Instead, we have had this silly competition between the two which isn't good nor is it healthy.

Ok...I think I have rambled off topic...forgive me :).

Ally, I agree with you completely on everything.

I'm not willing to conform into a social ideal, because quite frankly that's not who I am. I'm not one for fashion, I don't think about things like that...I simply wear what I like, what I feel comfortable in and most of all what reflects me personally. I'm a bit weird in the terms of 'fashion sense', well in comparison to popular fashion, because I like to wear bright colours, funky patterns, crazy shoes, haha xD
But I wear all that stuff because I find it interesting, and I think it fits me personally. I'm not going to go out my way to find out what everybody else is wearing, just in order to fit in...heck, most of the time they buy all their clothes in Primark, and I refuse to go anywhere near that place.

Then, as you said, the pressure set by the media is a standard set too far. Where is the individuality? They have seemingly stripped it from women and made them into objects, not people. I mean who can look perfect all the time? (not me that's for sure xD)...What I have gathered from popular trends in beauty and style (in the area that I live) is that you have to be very thin, tanned, caked in make up, and perferably dye your hair blonde. Just...no thanks.


Completely agree. Just...everything. Agreed :P

nice rant Leyra! thank you for participating!:P

it is true.. no one should change who they are just cause of what society thinks is cool.. i am happy to be your friend cause you are SO cool! :P you dont change for anyone.. and having a different and individual fashion sense is amazing.. everyone needs to be different haha

i guess im totally against the society.. cause im not an object, and im not thin, tanned, caked in makeup OR blonde.. im opposite of ALL! haha and im happier this way! plus your red hair is beautiful :D