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#3
11-26-2010, 02:05 AM
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Okay, I love this, as usual. You have a sort of rambling, semi-stream-of-consciousness style that is very unique and intimate. Also, you are very good at writing about war in a way that is human and believable and gritty without being overly dramatic. I also like how you are able to introduce OCs and give us a sketch of what they're like in just a few little details, so that we feel like we know them personally in just a few sentences.
Good work, and I hope you write more Jake-centric stuff. :-)
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All Avatar writings ------------------- Selected writings: You came back How do you make up after you've done the unforgivable? Jake and Neytiri have a conversation in the wake of Hometree's destruction, during their first real moment alone following his return as Toruk Makto. The Last Train Home Fourteen years after the war, a lone spaceship appears in the sky. The former members of the Avatar program watch its approach – expecting the worst, fearing for their adopted home. Then the ship lands. And suddenly, nothing makes sense anymore. Five seconds too late This is a different kind of Jake/Neytiri romance, the story that would've unfolded had she been delayed for just five seconds while trying to reach him following the fight with Quaritch. 
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