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#451
05-07-2011, 02:37 PM
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Here is a topical Avatar/Britney crossover. (It isn't really Avatar related, but never minded...
 Jake: I have a gift for you, Neytiri. Jake shows Neytiri a rolled up carpet. Jake unrolls the carpet to reveal the body of Bin Laden. Neytiri: But i thought the Special forces dropped it into the ocean in the end. Jake: Well, baby. I went down and got it for you. Neytiri: Oh. You shouldn't have. Last edited by neytirifanboy; 05-07-2011 at 03:56 PM. 
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#453
05-16-2011, 12:39 AM
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The day before the final battle, Jake and Neytiri are talking:
Neytiri: So, how did you make the bond with the Toruk, Jake? Jake: Well, I flew over the Toruk on my Ikran. I swooped down from above, leapt off the Ikran in mid-flight and launched myself in a suicidal desperate headlong rush towards the Toruk's back. Neytiri: And then what happened? Jake: I hoped for the best. Neytiri: Wow, Jake. That was really...er...brave and really...er....quite fortunate. Jake: Why? How did your ancestor make the bond with the Toruk? Neytiri: He flew up to Toruk's nest on his Ikran while Toruk was sleeping. The using Na'vi skills of stealth and silence, he made the bond with sleeping Toruk before Toruk had a chance to wake up. Jake: Wow, I never thought of that. That sounds almost...easy. Neytiri. Indeed. So how do you plan to defeat the Skypeople tomorrow? Are you going to use the Na'vi skills of stealth and silence. Jake: Er, no. I was thinking of swooping down on their air power from above and launching our horsemen in a full-frontal headlong desperate rush against their ground troops. Neytiri: And then what? Jake: And then I will hope for the best. Neytiri: Let Ewya help us. Last edited by neytirifanboy; 05-16-2011 at 12:42 AM.
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#454
05-16-2011, 12:53 AM
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Jake flies over the Toruk:
Jake: he is the biggest cat in the sky. So why would he ever look up. That was the theory anyway... Jake swoops down, leaps from the Ikran's back and.......misses. Jake falls to the right of the Toruk, but saves himself by crashing through the trees. An hour later jake is in the air again above the Toruk. Jake swoops down, leaps from the Ikran's back and.......misses. Jake falls to the left of the Toruk and crashes through the forest below. That night, Toruk makes a bond with a tree near his nest. Ewya: Look, Toruk. You're really going to have to give him some help here. I lost count the number of times you missed making the bond with the future Toruk Makto. Toruk: I'm sorry. I really tried hard. I went real slow and swerved to try and catch him. But the Skwang still couldn't hit me. Last edited by neytirifanboy; 05-16-2011 at 01:33 AM.
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#455
05-16-2011, 01:30 AM
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Topical contribution.
After the final battle. Mo'at: So Quaritch is dead. Jake: Yes. He is definaltely dead. Mo'at: How did he die? Jake: I stabbed him with my dagger while Neytiri was trapped underneath the Thanator. Neytiri suddenly appears. Neytiri: I see you, mother. Mo'at: I see you. I hear Quaritch is dead. Neytiri: Yes. I shot him with two arrows. Mo'at: Wait a minute. Jake just said he killed him with his dagger while you were trapped. Neytiri (glaring at Jake): What?????!!!!!! Mo'at: Why is there an inconsistency between your stories? Jake: Er, actually. Now now I think about it. I think Quaritch may have been struck by an arrow, although I am not sure who fired it. However, it was after I stabbed him with my dagger. Neytiri: It didn't happen like that. Quartich was holding the dagger when I shot him..... Mo'at: Why has your story changed? Why are there inconsistencies? Jake: Well, you know Mo'at. It was a very confusing situation. Was he killed by a dagger? Was he killed by an arrow? Was Quaritch armed when he died? Or did Neytiri ruthlessly shoot an unarmed man who was begging for mercy? It is all so difficult to remember in the heat of battle. Neytiri: You Skwang!!! Mo'at: Mmm. Anyway, are you sure Quaritch is dead? Did you check the body? Neytiri: No. I didn't. Jake: I did. Then I took his body on the Toruk and dumped it in the sea. Neytiri: Eh? When did you do that? Jake: While you were getting help, I went back in the link unit, called Toruk, picked up Quaritch's body, flew over the ocean and threw his body in the water. Neytiri: How did you manage to do that. You were so weak and had so little time? I wasn't away that long. Jake (pointing to self): Toruk Makto! Mo'at: So Toruk Makto. Quaritch is definately dead. There is no way we will see him again? There is no way he might miraculously re-appear again. Jake: He is defintately dead. He is pushing up daisies. He is six feet under. He has kicked the bucket. He has met his maker. He's snuffed it. He is no more. I can guarantee that we will never see the Quaritch walking on this Earth again. In fact, I would bet both my legs on it. My real legs that is. Mo'at: So you're not really sure then. Jake: Er, no. Not really.
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#456
05-17-2011, 03:08 PM
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Jake - Neytiri darling, fashion hint, that new colour loincloth? Soooooooh not working. And feathers? What were you thinking, honey?
Neytiri - *Sigh* Again with this?
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"When the time comes, just walk away and don't make any fuss."
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#457
05-27-2011, 05:18 PM
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Jake, Neytiri and Mo'at are discussing the impact of the final victory over the Skypeople.
Neytiri: Jake, mother has good news and bad news concerning the battle. Mo'at: Our losses were terrible. Our population was decimated and every single fertile male of all the clans except yourself was killed in the battle. Unfortunately Jake, as you are the only fertile male warrior available, you will have to relinquish your mated for life vow to Neytiri. You will be required to mate repeatedly with every single female of child-bearing age over the next few years to replenish the population. Jake: Outstanding. What's the bad news? Neytiri (glaring at Jake): That was the bad news. Jake. Jake: Oh really? I mean...er...right, Neytiri. Of course. That is terrible news. It is a sad day for the all the Na'vi clans. And a great and terrible responsibility that I will have to bear. So what is the good news then? Mo'at: I am still of child bearing age. Last edited by neytirifanboy; 05-30-2011 at 06:07 AM.
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#458
05-27-2011, 08:25 PM
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Lol
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#460
05-28-2011, 01:38 PM
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Hahaha, perfect
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#461
05-28-2011, 08:16 PM
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Jake is following Neytiri towards hometree:
Jake: So what's your name? A bola flies out and wraps itself round Jake's legs causing him to trip and fall over. Tsu-Tey and other Na'vi warriors come charging out the forest. Jake: Why did you do that for? Tsu-tey: That wasn't us. It was the damn Ewoks.
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#462
05-29-2011, 12:22 AM
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^ Lol
The Na'vi Horse Clan is charging through the forest, heading towards the RDA's forces. Norm: Charge! Wainfleet and the others are on T-Rexs and Raptors. Wainfleet: Come, my brothers! GET SOME! Quaritch: (laughs) That deal we had with Jurassic Park was a great success, eh?
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#463
05-29-2011, 01:50 AM
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Quote:
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#465
05-29-2011, 04:21 AM
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Quote:
Neytiri is teaching Jake Na'vi language: Neytiri: (points to eyes) Nari. Neytiri: (points to Jake) Skxawng. Jake: (raises eyebrow and points to Tsu'tey) Txim. Neytiri: (shakes head)
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