On 'debates', reaction, and an article.

[Human No More]

First of all, I'd like to link this article: Well-Kept Gardens Die By Pacifism - Less Wrong
It's an interesting read, and I wish I could say that I haven't seen the effects of it before, but I have.

As time goes by, it seems that we create division. That's nothing inherently either way in itself, but what is a problem is when that division becomes factions, when people hold a vendetta. Every community needs to defend itself to some degree - as the article says, "Maybe it's because I grew up on the Internet in places where there was always a sysop, and so I take for granted that whoever runs the server has certain responsibilities. Maybe I understand on a gut level that the opposite of censorship is not academia but 4chan (which probably still has mechanisms to prevent spam).".

Why do I bring it up? Because we all make mistakes. We're only biological beings of varying types. One of many things that makes ToS great is that we try to avoid these problems, even with varying degrees of success. We try to avoid the community fragmenting, even though we also leave methods to cause it unchecked. As much as it would be ideal for somewhere never to need any oversight, everywhere does.

Sometimes we make mistakes. Sometimes I make mistakes. Most people never hear of the problems averted by action that nobody would disagree with, but when that is applied to something that maybe it should not have been, misguidedly or not, it was not intended to be malicious.

Yes, ToS is based on Avatar. Yes, that might theoretically include people discussing their less positive thoughts from time to time, but it has to be kept in context, and understandably, such topics are bound to carry potential for problems. That said, people who are responsible for seeing that things keep running smoothly also contribute. Sometimes the two get crossed, and a mistake in judgement might look like something further. What is is not is a blank cheque for either side to take their own view to the extreme.

It's not just staff though. It is everyone's responsibility to keep ToS the place that they themselves helped make it. That means understanding how threads may cause problems and keeping it in mind; being careful around topics. Making a negative post about Avatar and one that can be construed as bashing it are two different things, but closely related; in return, people overreact and escalate it, and what might have been valid becomes another potential disaster waiting to happen.

So how do we stop the division as described? There's no single way.
It takes effort from everyone, and continued effort, both not to make a wrong decision, but also to recognise what could be problematic and not cause it to escalate. Anyone who does both has to balance the two. It's not fun, and I have had countless sleepless nights trying to get thing s sorted out over the years, in many cases several in a row. It's caused me pain, stress, and sadness - but it's all worth it. I hope it is for everyone else too.

The question is how to balance the two, for everyone. It isn't easily answerable, and will take time, but it will happen. But one thing that IS a part of it is judgement - not escalating things, and being careful around a topic that can easily be taken the wrong way.

It won't change overnight, but it can happen, if everyone cares about ToS, even in different ways.
There are years to the sequel, and I will make sure ToS is here by everything in my capacity, but it's not that that matters - it's everyone, including me, who needs to use some judgement. Don't damage ToS, and don't assume malice when someone makes a mistake. I've made mistakes, and I've assumed the worst. That's going to change.

Sometimes we all just need to remember why we're here.

-HNM