Eyes Wide Open Or Eyes Wide Shut?

[Stanley_9875]

Let me set the scene. The eyes blink open and shutter several times trying to adjust to the dark room. He inhales deeply and then exhales. He pushes open the door, and sits up looking at the floor. He sits in his wheelchair and begins to move himself down the room and through the hallway. His face is shaggy from not shaving in weeks, he looks skinny from not eating nearly enough, his eyes look dead and lost. The life he leads in his head he prefers over the one he's in right now. the other life is new, it's everything he's wanted; a loving community who cares for each other as much as themselves, a woman (so to speak, an alien woman) who wants to spend time with him because of who he is, living on the planet with the setting and landscape so beautiful... Now he lives two lives, one with eyes open and one with eyes shut. He knows which one he wants, he's living in it as physically as he is in his human form, but it's not him. I feel like the way Jake does in this scene for a few days now. My PAD is back no doubt. I live in two worlds, one with eyes open and he other with eyes shut. One I can physically see and the other I can mentally see. The opened eyed one has physical and emotional beauty but not as much as the shut world. In the shut world I am who I want to be, who I want to be with, where I want to be... This world it's hard to be who I want to be, hard to be who I want to be with, where I want to live. It's a struggle here every day. I know I'm not alone on this boat either. I know most of you feel the same way I do, and that gives me a lot of comfort. I love you all like my second family. Without you I don't know where I would be in life right now. I just had to get these feelings off my chest and wated to let you guys know how much I care for you. I wish we could all live next to each other and be the greatest group of friends, family, in the world. Thank you all for your support, listening, and love that you share and spread on this community. Oel ngati kameie.

John Ruskin*
The imagination is never governed, it is always the ruling and divine power.

Joubert
Imagination is the eye of the soul.*

Carl Sagan
Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were.

Duane Michals
I believe in the imagination. What I cannot see is infinitely more important than what I can see.

Tuli Kupferberg
When patterns are broken, new worlds emerge.*

Self
New worlds hold new oppertunities, a chance to start over

Unknown Author
Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.*