The Bear Age

[Aketuan]

lol, awesome. I want to try that Bear Age Cocktail.

Although I need a Facebook account to view the page...

[iron_jones]

Originally Posted by Aketuan

lol, awesome. I want to try that Bear Age Cocktail.

Although I need a Facebook account to view the page...

Get Facebook, you caveman.

And I"ll give you the gist of it.

Scientists have determined that the change over to the bear age will be on March 24, 2014 at 05:10 CST.

For those of you who who have never heard of a bear age; it is a period of time where every molecule of matter in this solar system turns into a full sized bear, except for the molecules that compose humans and bears. During this time, all molecules of matter that are not forming or inside of a living human or bear will turn into a bear; therefore if a person dies they become billions of full sized bears, if a bear dies it becomes billions of full sized bears. As a result of this, oxygen molecules will be replaced by bears and humans will need to quickly adapt to breath bears. In the bear age the entire solar system becomes large groupings of trillions and trillions of bears, engulfed by bees.

Also due to the absence of air, air pressure would no longer exist, instead bear pressure would take its place. Bear pressure is measured using a bearometer. In addition to these changes, during a bear age all space that was not occupied by matter will be filled by swarms of bees; but all bees keep all physical properties of space: they have no volume, mass or density. They're simply just there.

Because all matter that is not composing or inside of a living human or bear becomes bears; if you so much as scratch yourself, any hair or eyelash or dried skin that leaves your body will become bears. As well as the air and moisture you exhale, sweat, and other bodily functions would become bears.

Scientists have also determined that the bear age will end when the rapid growth of the solar system spreads over the remainder of the universe into a black hole of another universe. When contact is made with the black hole it will send our solar system back in time to the prehistoric ages to. Some believe that the solar system will age exactly as it did before, and all events and beings would be identical, thus leading to the same bear age, and back again. They believe that we are reliving the same events we have "previously" experienced repeatedly since the beginning of time. These are the common beliefs of Bearism.

[Isard]

Masterful trolling.


Carry on.

[iron_jones]

Originally Posted by Isard

Masterful trolling.


Carry on.

Haha... the amount off butt hurt on the event in the past few days is almost too much.

[Advent]

Ah, finally managed to attend it.

Now, I simply post it on almost each and every-one of my friends profiles....

[Cyvaris]

I for one welcome our new Bear overlords and look forward to serving them.

Hail Bears!

[Pa'li Makto]

I'm joining on Facebook.

[iron_jones]

Originally Posted by Pa'li Makto

I'm joining on Facebook.

Thanks, invite every single one of your friends.

[tm20]

bahahaha ****ing awesome. im attending. *sent an invite to all the people on my friend list, i bet most of them will ignore it since most of them i don't talk to or even know well.

*read the comments, cant believe some people take this seriously

[Clarke]

What tm20 said, but also:

therefore if a person dies they become billions of full sized bears, if a bear dies it becomes billions of full sized bears.

You're off by about 19 or 20 orders of magnitude.