Thoughts on oppressive discourse (Food for thought)

[Toshowlove]

Let me start this off by saying i'm in no way trying to make people feel bad about the mannerisms and/or slang diction that they may or may not use. This is just my opinion and perhaps a way to open eyes that perhaps don't see the covert ways in which "we" oppress others.

Everybody has heard it before... "Oh, Thats so gay! I'd never do that.." or "Haha, i love you bro! But NO HOMO!" and as lighthearted as they are intended to be in most cases, this negative homosexual connection is undenyable.

For a word that used to mean happy to have the context of Weird, distasteful, bad, while being synonymous with homosexuality speaks volumes about the suppressive ideologies that take place in society (I speak from a western point of view). If thats a bit too wordy for you, to put it bluntly - gay doesn't just mean homosexual, it also means bad, weird etc; the words have joined and are interchangeable.

What about that avocado green sweater suggests that it enjoys the company of other avocado green sweaters? What makes it "gay"? Is it just really happy? No... not in todays discourse. It's gay because it's tacky and doesn't match. Gay because its Different.

Personally, this really upsets me that this covert form of oppression not only exists, but even once pointed out is bluntly denied. "Oh, come on... chill out, i wasn't trying to insult gay people" "I have a gay friend, and they dont even mind those jokes". It saddens me that even the homosexual community has began to partake in this ideology. And the people who probably don't intend on oppressing homosexuals are responding in this manner likely just as a form of defense; I'm such a nice guy! How dare you say i'm discriminating.

Why is there a sudden need to make the distinction of your sexuality? "No homo!" As if everyone really cares about your sexuality to begin with, why the need to make sure people know you're not homosexual? Because as much as we can boast about gay rights and accepting those around us, there is still such a strong prejudice against homosexuals that has become more or less a fad. Why don't we say "No incest!" or "no [insert strong emotion here]" Seems to me like its the sexuality issue that requires dire addressing, because heaven forbid someone questions your rigid straightness.

The reason i even take the time to post this here is because it bothers me to know that in a community as loving as this, who accepts and Sees people this kind of stuff exists. Yes, i understand alot of it is unintentional and i'm not making any judgements of character here, please be aware of that. But for people who truly claim to See others, look at the ways in which you are clearing people from your sight and perpetuating this Cold, dark system.

Take this for what it is worth, i do not intend this to offend anyone, it is very much an opinion of a girl who just wants people to love EVERYONE around them, without prejudice.

Perhaps in the future you can see deeper into the covert was in which discrimination thrives.

[tallbluewanderer]

Originally Posted by Toshowlove

The reason i even take the time to post this here is because it bothers me to know that in a community as loving as this, who accepts and Sees people this kind of stuff exists. Yes, i understand alot of it is unintentional and i'm not making any judgements of character here, please be aware of that. But for people who truly claim to See others, look at the ways in which you are clearing people from your sight and perpetuating this Cold, dark system.

Take this for what it is worth, i do not intend this to offend anyone, it is very much an opinion of a girl who just wants people to love EVERYONE around them, without prejudice.

Perhaps in the future you can see deeper into the covert was in which discrimination thrives.

I hadn't really noticed these mannerisms on ToS, but you make a good point here. (Admittedly, I don't have nearly enough time to keep up with all the posts here -- I just look at a few subforums here and there when I have time -- so maybe this is more of an issue in one of the subforums I haven't read much of yet.) Either way, thank you for having the courage and strength of character to bring it up.

Things like these are so common that people may unconsciously be using words in a way that doesn't reflect their actual viewpoints. For example, a classmate of mine used to like referring to things as "retarded" without thinking about it -- when someone pointed this out to him, he realized that there were nicer adjectives he could use to get his point across and changed his ways. That change wouldn't have happened if nobody had brought the point up, though. I don't run across the issue you've brought up very often (the university I attend is very LGBT-friendly), so I don't know how common this is, but it's definitely worth realizing and confronting. (Sorry, that wasn't worded very well, but I hope I'm making some sense here.)

[Human No More]

The only time I've noticed it is in IRC, once.
As it is, I generally don't say it, except maybe sometimes joking around with friends, and even then, just in a way like 'hmm, you don't like Neytiri? you must like men then ', but not actually meaning it, or meaning to insult. For saying things like 'that is so gay', there are so many much better and more entertaining ways to express dislike of something, I think.

[Spock]

Yeah, that is what society has evolved into. Its a hard routine to break as well, I share your views on the matter also. Although I disagree with homosexuality on a scientific basis not a religious or social one.

[ZenitYerkes]

You know that until I met a gay person I thought they were all sissy and "Omigod look at those shoes!". He liked heavy metal as I do and seemed completely normal.

Heck, we've got too many prejudges to take rid of.

[rapunzel77]

I understand your feelings. No one wants to be discriminated against. I don't understand why certain words like the "n" word is being used as almost a term of endearment by some groups of people. The same is true with the word "gay". I have a gay friend myself. I've known him for several years and he is one of the kindest men I know. It is very, very silly to judge someone based on their race, culture, religion, gender, or sexual preference. We are all human and therefore should be treated with respect and dignity.

I personally haven't seen any derogatory discourse on TOS. I am glad of that as well since I feel that I can be open here. I can't on other sites. Let's continue to be respectful of others. That is what makes this community shine .